July 2009
69 posts
Calling Obi-Wan: Tumblr Version
Leia: Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You’re my only ho.
(muffled laughter)
Ben: What?
Leia: Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You’re my only ho.
(muffled laughter)
Ben: Are you saying, “ho”?
(muffled laughter)
Leia: No.
(muffled laughter)
Ben: Who is this?
Leia: Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You’re my only ho.
(muffled laughter)
Ben: Carol? Is that you? I think we...
Remind me to invite you people over to my house...
FOR CHEESE PIZZA.
Fine. Go eat your precious art. More cheese pizza for me, fuckers.
Take this microwave away and bring me a less...
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2009-7-26) →
Nick Lowe (273)
Chuck Berry (76)
Reigning Sound (51)
AC/DC (25)
The Band (23)
Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
Teen (Walks in over an hour into the movie Strange Brew) …
Wife (Trying to explain scenario as quickly as possible): They’re Canadian.
The Mutants of 2051 AD
B: “Fleshy-headed mutant, are you friendly?”
D: “No way, eh. Radiation has made me an enemy of civilization.”
B: “Alpha base, this is Bob McKenzie. I’ve spotted a fleshy-headed mutant in Sector 16B.”
Trumang?
I dunno if anyone remembers this retarded tweet from the other day, but like, um, is THIS normal?
It’s been retweeted so many times that I feel like 80 people have been ripped off at this point.
But still. Really?
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2009-7-19) →
Elvis Costello & The Attractions (56)
Frank Black (38)
Fleetwood Mac (34)
Elvis Costello (33)
Blondie (31)
Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
(t-144)
Elliot, do I look like a beautiful blonde with big...
Administration Seeks to Restrict Antibiotics in... →
“The legislation is supported by the American Medical Association … but opposed by farm organizations like the National Pork Producers Council.”
File under: Most Redundant Sentence in the History of Journalism
Note To Self
gordonshumway:
When someone introduces himself as Scott Miller, it’s best not to respond with a mouthful of extra-cryptic Game Theory lyrics.
Remember that not every Scott Miller was in that band, especially the Scott Millers who are over sixty.
P.S. You should probably draw from this lesson when greeting Ronnie Wood, the new towel guy at the gym.
P.P.S. This week’s UPS driver is Sharon...
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2009-7-12) →
Elliott Smith (69)
Badfinger (40)
U2 (34)
Booker T. & The MG’s (29)
Wreckless Eric (26)
Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
Tumblr - Twitter Dreams?
jessabelle2o7:
Luckily, mine have been few and far between. They’ve usually been: 1) sexual; 2) slightly violent, or; 3) a dazzling combination of both. Mostly, we’re talking sexy, bicuriously-charged get-togethers that turn into huge barfights, usually spurring from arguments over grammar. @franktheguy usually makes a guest appearance as either a referee or mediator of some sort (“Ladies,...
Watching Dexter 2
Her: She looks different.
Him: …
Her: Does she look different?
Him: Who?
Her: Rita. Dexter’s girlfriend.
Him: Yeah. I don’t know. It’s Season 2. She just looks different.
Her: Maybe.
Him: Women change.
Her: What?
Him (walking out of the room): They all change.
Her: ASS!
Watching Dexter
Her: Didn’t you say that was Keith Carradine?
Him: Yeah.
Her: What else was he in?
Him: WHAT ELSE WAS HE IN?
Her: Yeah.
Him: It’s Keith Carradine, for Christ’s sake.
Her: …
Him: Like a million things.
Her: I know, I know. But like what. Name something.
Him: Nashville.
Her: Eh. What else, though?
Him: Like a million things.
Her: What though?
Him:...
IT'S FUCKING STEINBECK YOU ANIMALS